|'m aLL aLoNe... sEaRcHiNg 4 aNsWeRs, bUt w|LL | eVeR f|nD tHeM?

Wednesday, November 28, 2007

Hello! long time no see, blog! its like,the last time i actually came up here was during jo's birthday. which is. 8 months ago. Faint. Ok just kill me. I wonder who actually still comes up here anyway. hmmm.

Exams just ended today. I finally had an experience whereby i couldnt do an entire 30 mark question. Because i only took 24 hours to study (no prior revision whatsoever) the stupid EE8062 Financial and Management Accounting. And I actually went for less than 30% of all the lectures this sem. Like. bloody slacker. If anyone is reading it, pls do not follow this. I dont even know if i can a S for this ( I S/U-ed it). Ok maybe i was so slack because i S/U-ed it. But more likely, I HATE TO BALANCE THAT SHIT. The whole page of numbers just confuse me. I cant multi task man.... And doing accounting was like... math again. I miss Amath and Cmath... but not this kind of math. =(

Lots of thoughts for the past few days. Basically... all on the tragic incident... ... I actually thought they were kidding when i first heard it from yvonne. Brushed if off initially. Then it became disbelief.->shock->worry->sadness. Shocking that something this would actually happen to someone around you.Especially someone in the same team, who once rowed with you on the same boat. It suddenly made exam period seem unimporant. No one would have expected a race to turn out so bad. For someone not very close to him, I'm feeling this bad already. Just cant help but hold back tears to even try to imagine the pain their close friends and family are going through.

A big blow to the dragonboat fraternity. Esp to the team. Trainings have been cancelled, not even allowed to canoe unless you have 1 star kayaking cert. Sigh. Penang trip has been cancelled. Its disturbing to think how training is going to be like when it resumes. Will everyone still live under the shadow of the incident? I hope that pang and fel will be ok... esp when they are so close to him.

Sigh. why. Why them. I started to think, why not other teams instead. But then i got really ashamed of myself. If it had happened to another team, we would all probably be alarmed by such an accident, but not be affected too much by it. But wont it mean that other people elsewhere in the world would be grieving and mourning for the loss of their loved ones too? Sigh. What a selfish thought. So.... why do such accidents happen. Why does anyone have to go through all the pain of losing someone? Why do we live, so that we die? Why do we have to die? Why do we live? Too many questions running through my head. And that happened while i still had 2 more papers. Faint.

Its proven. Singing sad songs while thinking sad thoughts help you cry better. Go try. you might feel better after letting it out. =)

They'll always be remembered. It was an honour knowing you. farewell...